That's Above my Paygrade
by Shepherd of the stars
Summary: Magical Strike AU. Alfred F Jones is the biggest troublemaker in the city and constantly picks fights with the wrong people for the thrill of it. Because of this, he has made a number of enemies, enough that he's gotten death threats and a couple of close encounters. So his father hired him a bodyguard.


Rusame secret santa 2017 gift for Iridulcentdays. Prompt: Bodyguard au

Warnings: blood, implied sexual content

* * *

Alfred listened halfheartedly to his father's lecturing coming from the speaker on his phone as he slouched in the seat of the car. He's heard these words a hundred thousand times over and over but Samuel Jones seemed to have forgotten. Or maybe he was trying to drill it through Alfred's thick skull.

"-but that is enough, do you hear me? Your secretary is sick and tired of cleaning up your messes and trying to answer to the press for you! No more! I hired a bodyguard for you. He should be waiting for you when you get back and I want you to treat him with respect. If I hear any complaints from him, I am cutting off your bank account. Sleep on the streets for all I care!" Jones senior finally took a second to breathe.

"Aw, dad, you hired me a bodyguard to keep me safe? How sweet." Alfred replied in mock appreciation. It was the only thing he had managed to say besides grunts of confirmation and 'yes' or 'no' responses.

"You idiot. Open up those clogged ears of yours and listen carefully. That bodyguard is not there for your safety and neither was he hired to be your human shield. I hired him as an adult babysitter, you hear me? So until you learn to grow up, he will be living with you, spending the days with you, and reporting your activity to me. Do not mess this up, boy."

Alfred didn't even get the chance to open his mouth before the tone sounded to indicate that the call had been disconnected. Though it wasn't like this was something new. His father always had the last word.

He tweeted a quick 'Just got a bodyguard. How do you like me now?' before scrolling mindlessly through his feed. Several flirtatious texts and many app switches later, they arrived to his condo where his chauffeur opened the door for him. Not a second later, reporters were sticking recorders and cameras at his face and bombarding him with questions.

"Mr. Jones! What do you have to say about your scandal with Francesca Vargas?"

"Alfred! Did you know Lovino Vargas is openly threatening you because of your relations with his daughter?"

"Mr. Jones! Rumor has it you have connections with the mafia! Is that true?"

"Alf-"

"Make room!" Like Moses reincarnate, a tall and handsome man parted the crowd and gestured for Alfred to get out of the car. His chauffeur was doing very little to keep the reporters at bay but it was enough for him to push through the hoard of flashing lights and chaos of questions. All the while, a pair of protective arms made sure none of them got too close and none of them could lay a hand on him. Once they got to the front doors, the building security handled the rest and blocked them from entering the building. And once in the elevator, Alfred finally felt like he could breathe.

"Alfred Frederick Jones, correct?" the man who had helped him asked in a thick accent. His hands were held at his sides like a stiff.

"Depends on who's asking." He quickly checked the man out before putting his key into the slot for his floor and turning it. The doors slid shut as the man straightened out his suit.

"Ivan braginsky. Your new bodyguard. Your father, I presume, told me to look for 'a rebellious idiot wearing a fur coat in the middle of spring with a streak of disgusting pink hair and a black star pasted on his cheek.' His words. Not mine." But the edges of Ivan's lips drew up in a little smirk that showed that even though he was not the one to come up with the words, he still found it humorous how accurate they had turned out to be.

"Asshole." Alfred muttered under his breath as he stepped out of the elevator once it stopped on his floor. The place was an absolute pigsty with clothes, food waste, and a general mess everywhere. The boy slipped his coat off and threw it onto the couch to add to the mess and chucked his knee-high boots to the pile as well. "Sorry for the mess. My maid quit like a week ago."

A week? Ivan looked around the penthouse in horror. Even though it had a modern and sleek look, Alfred's garbage made it look like a trailer park woman's hoarding room. "You made this whole mess… in a week…?"

"Impressive, huh? Follow me. You can stay in the guest bedroom." Alfred walked ahead of the stunned Russian to a room down the hall. The bedroom was simple with a bed, dressers, and a personal bathroom but it still needed some cleaning.

"My dad didn't tell me he was going to hire a bodyguard and he didn't tell me you were coming in today either so I didn't prepare you a room. To be honest with you, this is my fucking room. I bring people in here to fuck so um… don't get too comfortable…"

Ivan made a disgusted face as he looked over to the messy bed. It was no wonder the blankets were practically on the floor and the sheets looked like they were ripped off of the mattress.

"Is… Is there no other room…?" Ivan didn't want to sleep in a place that was basically a rentable room in a brothel. It was probably covered in disease and the semen and cum of several different people. Whatever Alfred's preference in bed partners was.

"Well there is one other room." Alfred gave him a smirk before looping his arms around the taller man and hanging off his neck. His hips were pressed flush against Ivan's. "You can sleep in my room, big boy." Alfred leaned close until his lips almost touched Ivan's but instead of meeting his lips, his lips met leather.

"No." Ivan had put a glove in front of his face and used it to gently push Alfred off his body. "Being your sexual partner is above my paygrade."

"So it's about money, huh?" Alfred dug into his pocket and took out a clip of hundreds. "How much? You're not too bad on the eyes. How big are you?"

"Too big for you. And too expensive," he took a step back, "kid." rubbing salt to the wound. The rich boy has probably never been rejected before and Ivan was right. The look on his face was enough to tell him so. "What are you? Seventeen?"

"I'm twenty. Geez. If I was younger, my dad would have gotten a nanny, not a bodyguard." Alfred huffed and turned on his heels, throwing himself onto the bed.

"Is that what I am? Your nanny?" He put his hands on his hips and gave Alfred an amused look.

"Dad said 'adult babysitter' so yeah, pretty much."

"Well in that case," Ivan walked over to the boy and with the strength of a bear, lifted him off of the bed easily. He tore out the sheets, blankets, and pillow cases then threw them into Alfred's arms. "Do the laundry. And clean the rest of the house as well. I will not be living in this wasteland."

Alfred's eyes blinked rapidly as if he was trying to process what was happening in his mind. "Wha…" Then it looked like it finally hit him. He dropped the dirty pile. "Who do you think you are? You're the hired help. You're the one who should be doing the laundry. So you go do it!"

"Ah ah ah. You said I am your adult babysitter. Which means I am your temporary parent. And your father said that if I had any complications with you, I can just give him a call. Wouldn't want to bother your busy daddy while he's at work because his little boy wouldn't do the laundry, hm?" That smug look and his baby-talk voice made Alfred's blood boil but he knew Ivan's threat wasn't a bluff.

"Fine!" Stomping his foot like a child, he picked up the pile of laundry and marched off to the laundry room. It was a small room with all of the cleaning supplies and admittedly, Alfred had never been in this room in his life. He had gotten as far as putting the laundry into the hole and closing the door but after that, he just stood there.

Why were there so many buttons?

He pressed one that looked like a power button and smiled when it beeped and turned on but then he was stuck again. There were so many dials and soaps and-

"You need help?"

Alfred flinched when Ivan appeared behind him with a pile of clothes in his arms. "N-no. Just uh… trying to figure out which setting to wash my clothes with."

"Alfred, that's the dryer."

"I knew that." He stared at Ivan's questioning face for only three seconds before throwing his hands up. "Alright fine! They look identical! And I've never had to do my own laundry before so I don't know, okay? Laugh all you want." He crossed his arms and tried to shrink his head into his body to hide his shame. Never in his life has be been so embarrassed. It was just a simple task like doing the laundry and he had no idea how to do it.

But instead of getting the mockery and insults he'd usually get from his father, he got a pat on the head. "It's alright." Ivan moved to put the clothes he had in his arms into the washer then gestured for Alfred to take his laundry out of the dryer. "It's not your fault that your life has always been luxury. If you never try, you'll never learn."

God, why did Ivan look so cool saying that?

Alfred nodded and moved his laundry to the other machine then looked up to Ivan like a patient child.

"Show me what you know."

Alfred closed the door of the washer then pressed the power button, listening to it beep. Then he turned to the shelf of detergent, bleaches, and softeners and just stared.

"Need help?"

He looked back at Ivan who was leaning against the washer cooly. Seems he was trying to teach Alfred to ask for help instead of expecting it to fall into his lap. "I don't know which soap to use." Ivan smiled and pushed himself off the washer, starting his lesson.

(-w-)

The rest of the month went on just like that. Ivan would tell Alfred to do a chore, Alfred would do it until he got stuck or messed up, then Ivan would just stare until he asked for help himself. Already, he's been getting better at it and Ivan found that Alfred had a strong interest in cooking. "It's like science!" he had said, his entire face lighting up.

As for his bodyguard duty, most of his job was just to fight off the press and was surprised to find many of them were way too aggressive. It was pretty hard holding back his urge to punch them in the throat when they had their recorders pressed against his cheek and huddled so close to Alfred that it was easy to see that the he was having a hard time breathing. It was like that everywhere. The office, the bar, his house, and even sometimes at the grocery store, now that Alfred didn't have a maid to do his shopping. But they endured and grew closer.

Honestly, this boy wasn't all that bad. During dessert with a bit of alcohol mixed in, Alfred had opened up to him. He talked about how his father was never around, his mother had left them, and when she left, she took Alfred's twin brother and little sister with her but his father had wanted to keep him to be his heir. So he was stuck here. Alone. And the maids didn't talk to him either or gave him any attention. So he sought the company of others. And even though it was the wrong kind of company, it gave him a few hours of happiness and made him feel less isolated.

"Admittedly, Francesca was a mistake."

"Francesca Vargas?"

"Yeah. Her. I was at a bar. Buzzed. And I saw her at a table with some dude who looked like he was her boring designated driver or something. She had on a tight red dress and looked really freaking pretty. Like I would get down on my knees and kiss her shoe, kind of pretty."

"Wait. Aren't you twenty? How did you get any alcohol?"

"I have a fake and I'm rich, Ivan. Now shut up, I'm telling the story." When Ivan opened his mouth to tell him how wrong it was, Alfred shoved a spoonful of vanilla bean into his mouth. "Anyways. She was real pretty. And of course I went over to say 'hi' and stuff but the dude she was with stopped me and said she didn't want anyone's company."

"Her bodyguard." Ivan mumbled, licking the ice cream off his lips and returning Alfred's spoon.

"I guess so. But I was buzzed so I just thought it was her protective brother or something." A shrug. "I told the dude that if she was old enough to be at a bar, then she was old enough to make her own decisions and it seemed to spark something in her. She knew I was right and screamed until the security dragged the man out. I talked to her, we drank, a lot, and then I called my driver, we sneaked out the back door, fucked in the car, fucked again at my penthouse, and the next morning, she left all scared."

"Condom?"

"Lack of… yeah… That was three months ago. I didn't even know her name and I don't even remember what happened that night until my dad called me and said I knocked up some important dude's daughter. If I could take it back, I would. It was so stupid." he sighed, leaning his head back on the couch. "And now the press won't shut up. They're making a huuuge deal about it and I just want it to stop already. I just wanna be normal, ya know?"

"I find that surprising. You seem to love your money."

"Well yeah, cuz I was born with it and I'm used to living this way but sometimes, I go to bed and just lay there. Thinking."

"Pea under your mattress, princess?"

"I'm serious!"

"Right. Sorry. Go on."

Alfred huffed and ate another scoop of ice cream to cool himself down before continuing. "The money is just handed to me. Like I don't even have to do anything to get it. I just gotta be alive and not run away or something. Makes me feel kinda… useless."

"Can't relate." Ivan muttered, which earned him a glare.

"You don't live my life so you wouldn't know. I just… hate being so dependent. I have no skills, no talent, and if my dad really did cut me off my allowance, then I'd be lost. I don't even have a resume. I've never worked a day in my life. Without my dad's money… I'm worthless…"

Ivan sensed that the conversation has taken a bit of a solemn mood, and admittedly, he hated seeing Alfred like this. He was always so brave and proud that seeing him so upset with himself was unsettling.

"That's not true." He scooted closer to Alfred then draped an arm over his shoulder. "I think you have a great natural talent in cooking. And you have a strong fascination with science. Especially archaeology. And I know you never said it but I know you like history as well. You also seem to have a strong interest in looking at the little details; you are very good at picking up patterns; and your face lights up when you find out about how things work. And I've only known you for a month."

He looked over at Alfred who seemed like he was near tears. "Did I say something wrong?" he stuttered.

But instead of answering, Alfred put their bowls down and wrapped his arms around Ivan in a tight hug. "That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. No one has even cared that much."

"Well seems like the next thing on my to-do list is to find you some new friends." Ivan let out a sigh and gave Alfred the hug he probably needed. Alfred was likely touch-starved after Ivan shooed away all his possible suitors and bedmates over the past month. In his defense, Ivan could tell easily that they were the wrong types of people for Alfred. And seeing him with someone else made his hands grow cold.

Wait. Was he jealous?

God, he was.

"Ivan?" Ivan grunted softly in response. "I think I love you."

Ivan's eyes widened as he looked down at Alfred. "This is a joke, right?"

"No! I'm serious. I've... never felt this way about anyone before. It's… fuck! This is embarrassing." Embarrassing enough that he had covered up his face with his hands and looked to the side.

Ivan found the action to be adorable and leaned forward to kiss his wrists. For his actions, he was rewarded with Alfred moving his hands off his face and letting him see the beet red blush that covered his face.

"D-did you just-?"

"I like you too, Alfred." Love? He wasn't sure yet. But being with Alfred made him the happiest he's ever been. And no matter what, that joyous laugh always made his stomach flutter and his heart jump.

"Oh gee, 'like'? Might as well stab me in the back." Alfred laughed a little nervously, not knowing if that were Ivan's rejection or some partially returned feelings, which meant he had a chance.

"I don't love you just yet, Alfred. Love takes time to grow and I don't want to jump to things too quickly. But, I do want to be with you. Try this relationship out. If that's alright with you."

"Yes!" Alfred shouted a bit too quickly but he was just too eager to be with this man.

"But no sex until you're twenty-one."

"Why! That's torture!"

"Alfred, on my first day here, I said I was too big for you and I was being serious. I might hurt you if you're not experienced enough so we're going to have to wait until you're twenty-one. But toys and other things, I will allow. I just don't want to hurt you, okay?"

Alfred was pouting but deep down he was grateful that Ivan cared about his pain and safety. So instead of pushing him, he just nodded and draped his arms onto Ivan's shoulders. "Seal it with a kiss?"

"That I will allow." Alfred's joyous giggles made Ivan smile up to his eyes and he even let out a laugh at Alfred's "preparation for a kiss" breathing and lip exercises.

"Right, okay, okay," He shook his face like a dog and breathed in and out deeply. "I'm ready. Kiss me!"

It was adorable. Ivan cupped his face gently with his hands, thumb rubbing over the scar on his cheek that Alfred had tried to hide with the black star. He gave that a kiss first, then his jawline, then his chin, and his forehead, until Alfred was audibly whining at Ivan's deliberate avoidance of his lips. Letting out a soft growl, Alfred took matters into his own hands and quickly pressed his lips against Ivan's before the torturous teasing could continue any further.

For a few seconds, it was like he had forgotten how to breathe. Kisses with his one-night-stands never felt like this. It was like a comforting warmth was injected into his body and made his skin tingle with an emotion he couldn't describe.

And before he knew it, they had pulled apart, his lips slightly parted and his face flushed. He blinked his eyes open shyly before finally meeting Ivan's eyes and finding that a blush dusted his pale cheeks as well.

"Was that good enough seal the deal?" Ivan asked, looking at him with a smirk which Alfred then mirrored.

"No. I think I need another one. You know. Just in case that one wasn't legally binding."

Looking at that cheeky face, Ivan had a feeling that he'd break his own contract. There was something about him that made him want to throw caution to the wind. Though, he had a feeling that Alfred would have no trouble with his size.

"Maybe one more."

(-w-)

The two were a chaotic pair. Now that Alfred had a partner in crime, that turned out to be equally playful, he grew more bold and reckless. Not even a week into their relationship, Alfred screamed "I have a boyfriend! Stop asking about a fling!" at the press after being hounded by questions about Francesca.

After his little slip up, their lives turned to hell. If the paparazzi had been persistent before, they turned absolutely obsessive over him in these passing months. All of the gossip magazines were eager to be the first to find the name of Alfred's boyfriend and many of them pulled up old photos of Alfred together with other men claiming that this person was his lover. Worse yet, some of Alfred's flings claimed to be his boyfriend just to be a part of the fame but rumors like that didn't last long.

"God, another one? I sucked this guy's dick like once at a gay bar over a year ago. He was a fucking asshole. Held me down and forced me to swallow all of his jizz even though I was trying to tell him I couldn't breathe." Alfred threw the magazine down to the floor of his limo and plopped his head down on Ivan's lap.

To Alfred's surprise, even after all his dirty secrets were dug up, Ivan never called him a whore. He didn't lose respect for him and not once did he call Alfred disgusting or ridiculed him about his partners like his father had done not long ago. He didn't understand why Ivan wanted to be with him but the bodyguard refused to leave.

"He doesn't deserve your anger, myshka. You'll get frown lines." Ivan's thumb massaged Alfred's temples as he left a kiss on his nose.

"Myshka? That's a new one."

"Little mouse."

"I'm not a little mouse!"

Alfred had thought the name was embarrassing but still, he was smiling, and that's all that mattered to Ivan. Oh how he wanted to tell the press that Alfred belonged to him but it was too risky. Alfred's father would fire him for sure and probably force a restraining order. He couldn't lose Alfred. Just the thought of it made his heart wrench.

"What are you thinking about?"

Alfred's voice shattered his bubble of thought. Ivan sighed and leaned down until his forehead was pressed against Alfred's. "Thinking about how much I love you." Then he looked into Alfred's eyes, waiting for a reaction.

Alfred's eyes grew to the size of saucers and he took in a huge breath. "Oh fuck! That's- That your first 'I love you'! You- You finally said it!" Alfred had grown so excited he fell off the car seat but he stayed on his knees in front of Ivan so their eyes would be level. "Say it again!"

Ivan's face heated up and in an instant, he grew shy. "I can't just say it randomly! It's harder than it looks, you know!"

"It's not! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! Come on! I want to hear it!" Like a dog waiting for his treat, Alfred smacked his hands against the seat of the couch and bounced his whole body.

"Alright alright! Quiet down or the driver will hear you through the window."

"He's too old for gossip anyways and I pay him well enough. Say it!"

Ivan sighed and rubbed the back of his neck before cupping his boyfriend's face and leaning in close. "I love you." The way Alfred's entire face lit up was almost comical but that gorgeous smile was infectious. Even when they kissed, Alfred couldn't stop his giggles and excited squealing.

But that happiness had to end eventually. The limo slowed to a crawl as they came into the condo driveway and Alfred could already hear the reporters with their questions.

"Hurry up and get to the penthouse so I can suck you." Alfred's flirtatious whisper sent a shiver down his spine and he left the limo with newfound vigor.

"Clear the way, please! Mr. Jones will not be answering any questions!" With one hand wrapped around Alfred and the other pushing away cameras, recorders, and hands, Ivan pushed through the crowd. There were so many questions being asked at once that Ivan could barely process any of them. All he heard was something about a new man claiming to be Alfred's lover, and something about the Vargas girl.

As they reached the entrance, someone, or a group of someones, gave the pair a strong shove, making Alfred flatten himself against Ivan's chest. He heard a couple reporters complain shout, "Watch where you're going!" or "How rude!" but it didn't matter to Ivan. They had made it inside the lobby. Oddly enough, Alfred still clung to him like a lifeline.

"Alright, we're safe." But Alfred still clung to him. "Come on. You can hug me when we get to your room. But right now, I need your key so we can go up to your flat."

Alfred muttered something under his breath but it was inaudible to Ivan.

"What did you say?" Ivan leaned his head lower so his ear would be by his mouth.

Alfred wasn't muttering. He was gagging. His eyes were wide with fear and body trembling just the slightest.

"Oh my god. What's wrong, Alfred?" Ivan pried Alfred's body off of his but the boy fell limp without him. It wasn't until Alfred was laid down on the floor that Ivan finally noticed.

There was a tear in Alfred's coat. No, not a tear, a slit. A slit with a wetness surrounding it. He ripped the coat off his body and what he found took the breath out of his lungs.

The back of Alfred's pure, white shirt was soaked his in blood. And to his dismay, the red was still blossoming, spreading like death's poison on his lover.

(-w-)

The trip to the hospital was a blur. When the nurses and doctors spoke to him, it felt like he was listening through a thick wall of water. His entire world felt like it was tilted at an angle and he swore all he could hear his own breathing.

It wasn't until something slammed into his head that he was dragged back into reality.

"This is all your fault!"

His eyes followed up a pair of legs to a body then a head. It was Alfred's father.

"I hire you to protect him and you can't even do that? My son is in the ER because of you! If anything happens to him, you can bet your ass I'm going to sue you until your comminist ass is deported back where you belong!"

Ivan couldn't feel anything. He just felt… numb. Slowly, he get up off the floor and returned to sitting in his seat but something hit him again. When he looked up, Jones Senior was being dragged out by the security while the nurse asked it if was okay. But before he could even respond, the nurse pressed a tissue against his temple.

"Sir, you're bleeding. Give me a second, I'll get you some bandages."

He could feel the blood sliding down his cheek but compared to the pain in his heart, it was nothing. He felt nothing. he wasn't even sure if he was still breathing.

"Sir? Sir? Are you Mister uh… Ivan Braginsky?"

Ivan looked up at the nurse. A new one. Wait, when had the other nurse bandaged his head? And when had it turned to night time?

"I am."

"Mister Jones just woke up and he's asked to see you."

Ivan rose from his seat and came forward so fast he almost knocked the nurse over. "Please, take me to him."

On their way to Alfred's room, he had stuck so close to the nurse's heels that he almost tripped on her, and though they were walking fast, it felt like the longest walk of his life. But at the end of the road, he saw Alfred.

Seeing him with tubes and other junk sticking out of him as he lay there in his hospital gown made it feel like his heart had fallen out of his chest. He felt like he had floated over to Alfred's bedside and if it wasn't for the pain in his knees when he fell on them, he would have forgotten he had legs.

"Alfred. Oh my god, Alfred. You're okay." He took Alfred's hand into his own, wishing the thick clip wasn't in the way.

"Well I feel dead." he scuffed, his voice weak. Even in this condition Alfred was joking about it.

"Please don't say that, Alik. I don't know what I would do if you…" He couldn't even bring himself to say it.

"It's going to take a lot more than a stab in the back to kill me." Alfred tried to laugh at that but his voice was raspy and the action made him wince in pain.

Ivan moved to sit on the edge of the bed so it would be easier for Alfred to see him. He reached down to move the hair out of his eyes and to give him a tender kiss. "I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you. I won't forgive myself for letting you get hurt like this."

"Baby, it's okay." Alfred gave Ivan's hand a weak squeeze. "I don't blame you for it. If anyone is to blame, it's me for causing this whole mess. But no blame games, okay? I'm fine. I'm alive. It's over."

"But I almost lost you." Ivan hadn't realized he was crying until he saw his own tears drip onto Alfred's face.

"But you didn't, okay? Hey, what happened to your head?"

"Don't change the subject."

"Talking about it is making it more painful." he lied, "Now tell me what happened to your head."

"Your father hit me." He sniffed and wipes his tears away with his sleeve. "He said he's going to deport me."

"Over my dead body."

"Alfred. Stop joking like that."

"What? I just beat death. Let me joke about it." And even when he was stuck in a hospital bed with stitches in his back, Alfred still tried to stay strong.

"You're lucky I love you." Ivan's lip was quivering even as he smiled.

"Yeah. I'm the luckiest person alive."


End file.
